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You + Two

Updated: Aug 8, 2020



Ever heard the saying, “if you want something done right, do it yourself”? I have! I’ve even said it myself! Why? Because, I’ve had so many experiences planning, organizing and sponsoring events where I relied on someone or others to help and was sorely let down! Of course, after each of these instances, I realized if this had happened more than once, I might should analyze the entire procedure from beginning to end to see if there was failure on my part to communicate clearly, delegate properly and evaluate the process of pairing skill/talent/giftings to tasks that needed to be accomplished.


I do realize there are some instances where we all work best alone. For example: if it is a delicate matter where confidences need not be shared, or a family/close friend event or happening that you have specifically been asked to do…or if it is simply something that you know with confidence you are suited to do and it isn’t too overwhelming and your time allows for it…then working alone can be great. But, for this particular instance, I want you to consider the advantages of you + two and how working together with other people can not only make the task more manageable and enjoyable, but help you to grow personally.


Back in Biblical times (which I refer to often because I study it a lot), but more specifically as far back as 2,000 BC…entire families, which could easily be in the hundreds or more, would make covenants with another family. I won’t go into all the ritual and significances of doing so, which is really incredible and interesting to study, but they did this for the sole purpose of merging families with opposite strengths and weakness. They traded one for the other, so that both families could co-exist, having all their needs provided. Let me give you an example. Let’s say Family “A” is a strong agricultural family; skilled at farming, raising and herding cattle of all sorts. Family “B” is exceptionally skilled in warfare and weaponry and implement making. If the families weaknesses were each opposite of the other’s strengths, then they might forge a covenant so that each family is strengthened in their area of weakness and are supplied all that is necessary to live a long, peaceable life.


So, here is where You + Two come in to play. When we join our talents/skills/giftings with others, we utilize the power of multiplication by combining our strengths. Where one is weak, another is strong. Many people fear when they work in groups that they lose their uniqueness. But that doesn’t have to be. We share and use our uniqueness to enhance the uniqueness of others in order to complete the tasks and projects we’ve been given. Your gifting is uniquely yours and when combined with other’s giftings, we can accomplish much greater things than what we often can on our own.


There are several things “KEY” to the success of You + Two. First, make sure you have surrounded yourself with emotionally intelligent people. It’s ok if there is one or two that are not as strong in this area, as long as the group itself is. These are people that are good at picking up on cues….verbal cues, physical cues (body language), and spacial cues. They are also experienced in honoring boundaries. Most of the group should be emotionally stable to the point that they understand this exchange “my weakness for your strength” without feeling threatened. Secondly, you will need to be especially apt at discerning the signs of those that are feeling “small”, compared to the overly strong individuals in the group. Be vigilant to keep yourself in check when it comes to these feelings yourself, especially that of jealously. Recognizing these cues from others and evaluating your negative “feelings’ and thoughts will keep you focused and in agreement with the power of You + Two. Lastly, make a point to applaud others when they do exceptional work and are operating in their gifts/talents. Refuse to be threatened by another’s strengths and abilities. Rather, encourage the strengths you see in others and help them to see they can rely on your strengths when they are needed as well. Signs of jealous and feeling threatened is an indication of an individuals insecurities and emotional immaturity. We all grow emotionally as we age to a certain extent, but often tragedies and wounds from our past experiences can create barriers to maturing like we need to in order to work unhindered with others. When you acknowledge the strengths of others, you not only demonstrate great leadership qualities, but are also creating an atmosphere where others feel less threatened and more relaxed to work with you.


Working along side others in a group with a worthy goal can be very rewarding. Sure, we all like the “at a boy’s” we get when we’ve accomplished something on our own, but group accomplishments can be just as rewarding. Here are some of the benefits of You + Two:


  1. Relationships are strengthened and friendships forged.

  2. We come to the realization that people CAN be dependable and giving.

  3. We realize just how much we really do need others.

  4. A sense of community and unity is developed

  5. Our emotional intelligence grows as we recognize our weaknesses and other’s strengths

  6. We establish a network that can be useful in the future.

  7. We develop pride and appreciation for other individual’s talents and abilities.

  8. We become known as someone that has unique abilities and can be relied upon to do what is right and good for the sake of the “whole” and not just ourself.


The next time you are presented with a task that could more easily be done as a group, consider the “KEY’S” I mentioned earlier. Choose your participants wisely, considering each one’s uniqueness and your weakness. Once all have excepted the invitation to participate, be vigilant to discern cues within the group as well as performing regular “self-evaluations”. And, don’t forget to be their cheerleader! Applaud each person’s part in the success of your effort. Sharing the recognition of work well done not only develops your emotional maturity, but also allows the individuals of the group to view you as a true leader that graciously honors others as people most unique!


You + Two………..Undeniably Powerful!!

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